|
|
Who Is Forming Whom?
People are learning from the way your church talks.
At a recent event, Dontá McGilvery watched each participant empty a small bag of toys and choose the most meaningful object. No one at his table picked the plastic skull. Then a woman nearing 80 picked it up and said she could tell from the teeth that it belonged to a healthy person. When asked how she found something good to say about a skull, she answered, “You have to find something good to say about everything.”
In a recent Lewis Center article, McGilvery, a pastor and scholar, views her answer through the lens of Paul’s instruction in Ephesians 4:29: let your words build others up according to their needs. Ultimately, the way believers speak sits at the center of what a community changed by Christ looks like.
Paul also tells Christians to speak the truth in love, and, as McGilvery notes, sometimes the wholesome word names a wrong or states a disagreement. Gracious speech leaves room for both accountability and boundaries.
Children and new believers learn what Christian community looks like by listening to how mature believers talk about one another, especially in conflict. A church where people can disagree without becoming enemies, correct without humiliating, and apologize without defending themselves is a church growing in love.
But is your church practicing it?
Teach it as discipleship. McGilvery cautions against assuming Christians already know how to speak well. Build time into Bible studies and leadership gatherings to practice listening, disagreeing, and apologizing.
Set the norms before the tension. Decide with your leaders how disagreements will be handled in meetings. Decline to engage gossip, and model gracious language from the pulpit.
Ask the Ephesians 4:29 question. At your next staff or elder meeting, ask: What do the ways we speak to and about each other reveal about our leadership team?
|
|
Ministry Intel
Chuck DeGroat: Is Ministry Outpacing Formation? | ChurchLeaders
On the FrontStage BackStage podcast, therapist and spiritual director Chuck DeGroat tells host Jason Daye that ministry rewards what is fast and measurable, while formation ripens slowly. Leaders can become competent long before they become mature, and habits that help early can cost later.
Mom, Dad, Jesus or AI? Who Teens Turn to for Advice | Barna
When teens want advice about who they are, they turn first to mom (84%) and dad (78%), according to new research from Barna and Christ In Youth. Faith-Activated teens rank Jesus and the Bible (78% each) nearly even with mom (80%). Barna suggests youth ministries equip parents instead of competing with them.
Growth Toolkit
A database for each person’s contact details, notes, and follow-up workflows. Workflows make sure guests and new members get a second conversation. Free plan available.
Hosts your livestream with live chat, one-on-one prayer, and response prompts for online attenders. It turns viewers into people your team can greet, pray with, and follow up. Free.
What would you like to see more of? Hit reply and let us know.
You're receiving this because you care about growing healthy churches. Forward this to a fellow pastor who could use some encouragement.